Omaha isn’t really in Nebraska. It is sorta like West Council Bluffs, Iowa, (if there was one) but without the ambiance.
On Friday, I sentenced a young Guatemalan woman, with no criminal history. Horror of horrors, she used a fake idea to get a shitty job. Despite the Guidelines, I sentenced her to time served and no supervised release. That way ICE will allow her to depart voluntarily and she will be able to take her three little American-born kids with her back to a country where there is no milk and honey but only grinding poverty. Aren’t I a fucking hero?
In Omaha, I have to go through five security devices from the time I arrive in the secure basement parking garage, travel in the “judges only” elevator, drop my stuff of in the office, put on my wrinkled old robe, and enter the courtroom to imagined trumpets. We federal district judges are certainly special, don’t you know.
When I drove back to Lincoln on Friday, I listened to Rush Limbaugh to punish myself.
As I get ready to go to Sioux City on Sunday to try a difficult civil case in the Northern District of Iowa, I realize why “volunteer” is synonymous with “dumb ass.” Just who in the hell am I trying to impress?